As hashers arrived at the hash site it didn’t take long to realize that parking would not be easy with double yellow lines or a continuous white line evident. Boo certainly didn’t look happy and soon disappeared to be spotted later as we ran off having parked well away from the run site.

On up the road but then where? A sudden shower at five had washed all signs of the hash trail away. As hashers ran in all directions Armless was heard to say ‘Orchard Road.’ Is that where he wanted to go or where he thought the trail would be heading? Finally Cheeks Out called on but not for long. We had reached a patch of green and Wet Patch and Shoe Shopper disappeared to the right following their noses and lots of litter! Luckily Ditch spotted the hares on the other side of the highway who pointed him in the right direction – left.  We reached a really busy road and hashers took their lives into their hands trying to dodge the traffic. With no crossing in site this was definitely a hash shittable offence.

The trail then took the survivors along a drain with Bagless politely pointing out    We scrambled across graves slippery after the rain and into Bukit Brown Cemetery. A circle check followed by a T brought everyone together – the T checkers having to negotiate a rotten bridge!  Mount Pleasant Road indicated we were not far from the beer truck. Back on the in trail so we knew where we were. Strapless was spotted running round the school track rather than the hash – had arrived late and as we know the beginning was not marked.  

The Pre-Run by our Mystery Pre-Run Reporter: Cheeks Out

The runsite was a foreboding of things to come – maybe we should make the hare Hash Cash for a year so he can get a car and join the rest of the membership in the weekly quest of looking for a place to park. Slack Arse and Boo were parking, moving, reparking and then moving their chariots again like two broody hens looking for a place to nest. Maybe they thought the fire hydrant had a concealed CCTV camera. Finally Boo disappeared to goodness know where only to return after the run – probably thought he could talk his way out of being booked. Slack Arse headed up the hill only to be chastised by Loose Change on his return for parking too far away.

On the dot of 2 minutes past 6..................

The Run by our Mystery Run Reporter: Hot Single #01: XYZ

The hot single remains a mystery this week so I will write whatever I know about the run.

The pack started off uphill of Malcolm Road trying desperately to find paper, flour or chalk. None was to be found, the rain did a good job removing any traces of trail. 10 minutes or so into the run, Ditch observed what appeared to be a hare in the far distance. Trying to communicate with sign language, he was sure that the trail was going over a bridge close to Mount Pleasant Rd. Indeed, there were one or two pieces of paper on the way.

Over the bridge and the trail was gone again. Part of the pack went left, part of the pack went right. I was in the latter part of the pack. We went down Mount Pleasant Road only to find Astronut who was guarding the first real trail marking of the run. Again, the pack split, Astronut and some others went right, through some graveyards, over the PIE and home. Wet Patch and Cherry Picker turned left and ran quite a bit of the real run in reverse direction. Nice trail through Bukit Brown Cemetery. 

After reaching a circle check and T-check in the same 10m2 of terrain, we decided to fight our way through dense jungle to the PIE. Upon reaching the PIE, the pack separated again, Wet Patch went right and I went left to pick up from the home trail found by Astronut earlier. After another loss of trail I met up with a bunch of hasher let by Comes Quietly and we made it back just in time for a cold beer .

It could have been a good run if only we had found trail.

Cherry Picker (no single but h..)

The Circle by: Cheeks Out

The Circle commenced right on time

In the absence of Grand Mattress, the Grand Master, Cock Radio brought in the chosen one for the evening, Wonton, a serene presence, so as to speak.

What did we think of the Run: The Grand Master set the scene for receiving feedback on the run by leading a hapless, hunched form into the circle duly noosed. Was this yet another abandoned Christmas present pet? No, it was the luckless hare Kan Not Can. Amongst calls of “pull it tighter” and “”he is not well hung”, the opinions were delivered. The usual shouts of “good run”, “not his fault it rained” were eventually drowned out and the Grand Master at long last (about time too) decided to exercise his authority by declaring it Hash Shit.

Tell us about your On On: Red Lantern - no flour, chalk or paper needed to find this either.

Next Week’s Run: Phoney Dick suitably attired as a social member announced the run site as Track 24 off Lentor Avenue. On On Seletar Seafood Restaurant

Virgins: Valerie had made it back to the run site. The other virgin (Cui Bing Gie) had been bloodied on the run (nothing to do with me said Cock Radio) and taken a short cut to hospital. Fortunately only superficial damage but bad luck nevertheless – please come back – injuries are rare.

Visitors: Kelly, Plunger, Sunee, Grace, Hans 

Returnees: Shiggy Piggy 

New Members: Trash

Milestones: 50 runs Kan the Kobra. The shouts of Off Off were ignored and shirts duly doubled up.

Do we have a Hare Whip? Kannot Kan

Mystery Whip: Iron Crotch

Mystery Mystery Whip: (was to have been TBA??– landed in hospital so a quick replacement was sought – who always pipes up at the end any way? ....)  On in comes the circle reporter’s nightmare – second only to Aye Aye – Mr AOB himself aka Stash. Age is beginning to tell – he needed a week to formulate this charge as it related to last week’s run.

Prick of the Week: absent

AOB

There was more but I did not get around to scribing this until Monday morning and my short term memory is clearly declining fast – promise to do better next week!

Circle closed: eventually

On On On On!  

Scribed by: Cheeks Out

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